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Not into this but this forum strangely comforts me

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123456kevin   United States
Joined 3 weeks
I’ve been dealing with an ED for a while due to beauty standards, I feel like I have to starve myself cause I’m ugly if I’m not skinny and no one will ever love me. I’m not into this but this forum is strangely comforting when I’m really deep in my ED, that some people wouldn’t find me ugly for my chubby appearance. So uh- Thanks for existing ig?
3 weeks

Not into this but this forum strangely comforts me

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Glitter Jelly   Canada
Joined 1 year
123456kevin:
I’ve been dealing with an ED for a while due to beauty standards, I feel like I have to starve myself cause I’m ugly if I’m not skinny and no one will ever love me. I’m not into this but this forum is strangely comforting when I’m really deep in my ED, that some people wouldn’t find me ugly for my chubby appearance. So uh- Thanks for existing ig?


If you read my posts you'll see how much I relate to your experience and there are many other people here who can relate to your experience.

Not everyone here is or wants to be fat.

Some are fat admirers (FA) but are ashamed to admit it in their everyday life for fear of being ostracized.

Others love to feed or encourage other people in their weight gain journey.

Many just happen to be fat and appreciate the fact that this is (mostly) a safe space to exist in a larger body.

What brings us together is the belief that fat isn't morally wrong or intrinsically ugly.

I've suffered from (and still struggle) many eating disorders. I used to be obese before I lost half of my body weight during an anorexia relapse but in the last months I've unintentionally gained a lot of weight and find it extremely hard to accept.

Having a body is hard in this day and age where diet culture is everywhere and thinness is considered morally superior.

It's obvious my body desperately wants to be fat and has been fighting against my best efforts to control it.

I wish I was born in an era when being fat was considered beautiful... I could allow my body to expand to whichever size it wants and would embrace my fat. Life would be so much more enjoyable without feeling guilty for loving food.
3 weeks

Not into this but this forum strangely comforts me

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Monthofdays   United States
Joined 17 years
123456kevin:
I’ve been dealing with an ED for a while due to beauty standards, I feel like I have to starve myself cause I’m ugly if I’m not skinny and no one will ever love me. I’m not into this but this forum is strangely comforting when I’m really deep in my ED, that some people wouldn’t find me ugly for my chubby appearance. So uh- Thanks for existing ig?


Well, strange comfort is still comfort. I wish you all the best with your ED and hope that you can find peace with yourself and happiness in your body.

What led you to find this site?
3 weeks

Not into this but this forum strangely comforts me

Avatar
BigBallBellyGirl   United States
Joined 1 year
123456kevin:
I’ve been dealing with an ED for a while due to beauty standards, I feel like I have to starve myself cause I’m ugly if I’m not skinny and no one will ever love me. I’m not into this but this forum is strangely comforting when I’m really deep in my ED, that some people wouldn’t find me ugly for my chubby appearance. So uh- Thanks for existing ig?


I sure wish you all the best as you sort through the complexities of an ED. People come here for many reasons, and you are WELCOME here.

I hope you grow to see your value, your beauty, and everything you offer as a human being.. I am a big girl and always have been. I have a very good friend who is in recovery from an ED, and she's on the opposite end of the size spectrum. I'm hardly an oracle of wisdom, and I certainly have no therapeutic expertise, but I did ask her once, when she was deeply struggling, if she considered me a good friend. She said she certainly did.

I asked what she liked about me. She said she appreciated my loyalty and my kindness. She said I'm funny, and I'm open-minded.

Then I asked her if she would love me more or consider me a better friend if I wasn't fat. I encouraged her to take a long pause before answering. After that pause, she verly clearly said It would make no difference.

The reality is, people of all sizes can be beautiful. Please know that "ideals" are an illusion, and they are also subject to change over time. You are enough, just as you are. I wish you lots of health and happiness.
3 weeks

Not into this but this forum strangely comforts me

Avatar
Glitter Jelly   Canada
Joined 1 year
This reply is helping me as well. Thank you for sharing your wisdom.
3 weeks

Not into this but this forum strangely comforts me

Avatar
123456kevin   United States
Joined 3 weeks
123456kevin:
I’ve been dealing with an ED for a while due to beauty standards, I feel like I have to starve myself cause I’m ugly if I’m not skinny and no one will ever love me. I’m not into this but this forum is strangely comforting when I’m really deep in my ED, that some people wouldn’t find me ugly for my chubby appearance. So uh- Thanks for existing ig?

Glitter Jelly:
If you read my posts you'll see how much I relate to your experience and there are many other people here who can relate to your experience.

Not everyone here is or wants to be fat.

Some are fat admirers (FA) but are ashamed to admit it in their everyday life for fear of being ostracized.

Others love to feed or encourage other people in their weight gain journey.

Many just happen to be fat and appreciate the fact that this is (mostly) a safe space to exist in a larger body.

What brings us together is the belief that fat isn't morally wrong or intrinsically ugly.

I've suffered from (and still struggle) many eating disorders. I used to be obese before I lost half of my body weight during an anorexia relapse but in the last months I've unintentionally gained a lot of weight and find it extremely hard to accept.

Having a body is hard in this day and age where diet culture is everywhere and thinness is considered morally superior.

It's obvious my body desperately wants to be fat and has been fighting against my best efforts to control it.

I wish I was born in an era when being fat was considered beautiful... I could allow my body to expand to whichever size it wants and would embrace my fat. Life would be so much more enjoyable without feeling guilty for loving food.


I legit could’ve written this myself. I also used to be obese, endured terrible bullying, lost a bunch of weight and then gained some back after just being too mentally tired to keep starving myself. I’m happier like this but I feel ashamed for liking my body at this weight. I feel you, I wish I lived in like the 1800s where being fat was cool, I don’t wanna be fat but it’s nice to know that if I did get fat I wouldn’t be ostracized, I don’t have that constant fear when eating food.
3 weeks

Not into this but this forum strangely comforts me

Avatar
123456kevin   United States
Joined 3 weeks
123456kevin:
I’ve been dealing with an ED for a while due to beauty standards, I feel like I have to starve myself cause I’m ugly if I’m not skinny and no one will ever love me. I’m not into this but this forum is strangely comforting when I’m really deep in my ED, that some people wouldn’t find me ugly for my chubby appearance. So uh- Thanks for existing ig?

Monthofdays:
Well, strange comfort is still comfort. I wish you all the best with your ED and hope that you can find peace with yourself and happiness in your body.

What led you to find this site?


I was having a really bad day and just searched up “feeder forum” cause I thought that was the only thing that could stop me from relapsing, knowing that even if it’s in a sexual sense SOMEONE ANYONE wouldn’t hate me at my weight
3 weeks

Not into this but this forum strangely comforts me

Avatar
123456kevin   United States
Joined 3 weeks
123456kevin:
I’ve been dealing with an ED for a while due to beauty standards, I feel like I have to starve myself cause I’m ugly if I’m not skinny and no one will ever love me. I’m not into this but this forum is strangely comforting when I’m really deep in my ED, that some people wouldn’t find me ugly for my chubby appearance. So uh- Thanks for existing ig?

BigBallBellyGirl:
I sure wish you all the best as you sort through the complexities of an ED. People come here for many reasons, and you are WELCOME here.

I hope you grow to see your value, your beauty, and everything you offer as a human being.. I am a big girl and always have been. I have a very good friend who is in recovery from an ED, and she's on the opposite end of the size spectrum. I'm hardly an oracle of wisdom, and I certainly have no therapeutic expertise, but I did ask her once, when she was deeply struggling, if she considered me a good friend. She said she certainly did.

I asked what she liked about me. She said she appreciated my loyalty and my kindness. She said I'm funny, and I'm open-minded.

Then I asked her if she would love me more or consider me a better friend if I wasn't fat. I encouraged her to take a long pause before answering. After that pause, she verly clearly said It would make no difference.

The reality is, people of all sizes can be beautiful. Please know that "ideals" are an illusion, and they are also subject to change over time. You are enough, just as you are. I wish you lots of health and happiness.


I almost criedddd thank yooooou 😭 I also have a very supportive friend who dosent think I’m fat but insists that if they thought I was they genuinely wouldn’t care, they also think fat people can be beautiful and I honestly agree. I’ve seen lots of hot fat people
3 weeks

Not into this but this forum strangely comforts me

Avatar
Glitter Jelly   Canada
Joined 1 year
123456kevin:
I’ve been dealing with an ED for a while due to beauty standards, I feel like I have to starve myself cause I’m ugly if I’m not skinny and no one will ever love me. I’m not into this but this forum is strangely comforting when I’m really deep in my ED, that some people wouldn’t find me ugly for my chubby appearance. So uh- Thanks for existing ig?

Monthofdays:
Well, strange comfort is still comfort. I wish you all the best with your ED and hope that you can find peace with yourself and happiness in your body.

What led you to find this site?

123456kevin:
I was having a really bad day and just searched up “feeder forum” cause I thought that was the only thing that could stop me from relapsing, knowing that even if it’s in a sexual sense SOMEONE ANYONE wouldn’t hate me at my weight


I feel these forums aren't strictly about the sexual kink of feedism but also about body acceptance and, as I've mentioned above, are one of the rare safe spaces for fat human beings to exist and be celebrated.
3 weeks

Not into this but this forum strangely comforts me

Avatar
Silverx   Netherlands
Joined 5 years
I've had the most complicated relationship with food and my body since forever. I'm actually really into feederism as weird as that might sound, it's interesting how those things can exist together. But feederism has saved my life for sure. If it weren't for this community existing I would have probably gone fully blown ED, I'm glad it was never that bad. I'm glad that throughout this community I had a safe space where the thought of me getting fat would be celebrated contrary to the messages I got all around me while growing up.
3 weeks
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